Friends vs. True Friends

Isn't it a common thing to hear (and for most of us to say) "that's my friend, or, oh, she's a friend of mine" well, I think the word friend tends to be used too freely.  There is such a difference between friend and acquaintance.  But, it seems as if we all forget that, and I have come to discover that because of this, we open ourselves up for hurt, disappointment, and a lot of very bad advice! 

As of late, our life has been somewhat tumultuous.  Because of this, we have had to make some very difficult and somewhat painful decisions.  These decisions are to better our marriage, no, actually to ensure that we remain married.  Don't get me wrong, Mark and I are fine, but we are having such huge issues with his ex wife that we have had to make these choices.  Now, I know for me, if I am your friend and you come to me with a problem you are having and let's just say for arguments sake that you have come to a decision.  You explain to me that this decision did not come lightly and you have done a lot of praying and thinking about it.  I, as your friend would offer you support!  I would tell you if I thought there was maybe a different solution, however, I would never suggest destructive life altering solutions to you! 

This is exactly what has happened.  Mark has such a huge heart and the choice we have come to together was a difficult one.  So, he tells one of his friends and this person's reaction absolutely FLOORED me and Mark!  His reaction was that we should just get divorced!  Yes, you read correctly!  His solution was that we should just throw in the towel and let Rene win!  I could NOT believe my ears and from the look on my husband's face, he couldn't either!  Later in the evening, I looked at Mark and told him that this person was not a true friend.  Real true friends would never ever suggest such an absurd thing!  I know I wouldn't.  Let's see, here you have this couple who has been married 4 months, by all accounts, they are happy.  They love each other and it is obvious, the only thing not running smoothly in their life is an ex wife.  So it's only logical to suggest that they just call it quits right?  I was appalled!  No, he is not a true friend.  This sparked a whole conversation between us about true friends vs. acquaintances. 

Just as I was feeling pretty sad about the whole thing, I got a text (meant for both of us) from a friend...yes a true friend, and she was about to show us how much of a true friend she really was!  This person we have both known for years, Mark longer than myself.  In fact, both of our ex's used to work with her and Mark was even in her wedding! 

This is what I consider to be a TRUE FRIEND.....

She doesn't really know the whole situation, we haven't told her everything, but have told her a little bit, as well as told her the decision we have made.  She sent a text saying this: "Thank you for everything you and Mark do!  You are an amazing team and don't forget that or let anyone else make you think differently!  Nothing worth having comes easy!  I love you both and you need to stay strong for each other, life is a roller coaster!  You have to do what is best for the two of you, because in the end, that's all that matters!  Nobody knows what you live with except you two.  It is so easy to take things to heart but you have to think about you two first and then the kids.  People can give their opinion but it doesn't matter because they don't live it every day.  Be strong like you have been, that's what makes you guys you!  Be happy, you guys have earned it.  Take a deep breath and let God handle it, everything happens for a reason!"

I really couldn't believe what I was reading!  Just as I was starting to doubt that we had any true friends (besides our family) who would stand behind us and support us in our decisions, she sent this.  I needed, we both needed, at that very moment to hear those words, and somehow, 40 miles away, she knew this!  So, we both went to bed last night feeling refreshed, feeling like we really do have true friends out there and even if there are a couple of acquaintances that don't really have our best interest at heart, there are friends, true friends that do!  And for this, I am SO thankful.

Don't get me wrong, I know we have more true friends than just this one, but she is the one who is standing out right now.  You know who you are and all I/we can say is thank you...from the bottom of our hearts, thank you. 

Disclaimer:  To all of our family (and Belt Buckley Family) we know you are true friends in the entire sense of the word!!